The now-famous Blog, participating in the marketplace of ideas, protected under the First Amendment, sez SORRY to blog star Christopher Ambrose of 381 Horsepond Road, Madision, Connecticut, where he cages Mia, Matthew, and Sawyer to satisfy his severe, undiagnosed, untreated, mental disorder, subliminal woman hatred, and lack of manliness. Sorry he is such a miserable person, blog copy staff are so sorry they lit Church candles for redemption of his miserable, blackened soul, so coveted by Satan.
Blog legal department reviewed Mad Man’s civil lawsuits against EasterBasket Auntie and Frank Parlato; trite does not begin to describe the complaint. Mad Man ‘prays’ for relief by asking the court to issue unconstitutional prior restraint orders, a fabricated effort to chill expression; demands defendants pen apology letters to the now-famous Blog, (WTF?) also claiming unspecified monetary damages. In the interest of jewdicial efficiency, Blog legal department concedes to Mad Man’s demands for relief, hereby settling the suits. Blog editorial staff issues two letters of apology to Chris: F U. Done, settled.
Blog happily retracts everything nice ever said about Christopher Ambrose, such statements facially untrue. Blog further acknowledges Christopher Ambrose abuses Mia, Matthew, and Sawyer, under federal legal definition: CAPTA 42 USC §5101 et seq. The Blog also apologizes to Mia, Matthew, and Sawyer … so sorry you ended up in the household of Christopher Ambrose, you deserve better, sorry the jews of family court raped your childhood because Mad Man had lots of money, sorry your childhoods were destroyed by the jewdicial discretion of Jane Grossman and Gerard Adelman, sorry you have ‘fundamental rights‘ to hug mom, sorry such rights do not apply in Connecticut, sorry you are abused by jews Debora Gruen and Robert Horowitz, predators for shekels, sorry jew Nancy Aldrich came into your life, sorry jew Jocelyn Hurwitz promoted your best interests, sorry jew Jessica Caverly wrote such terrible things about your mom, then lied about the monster in your life … sorry these jews inflicted so much suffering, sorry that Karma has not caught up with the Mad Man and his overpaid jewish leeches.
The now-famous Blog hereby makes ‘frank and full acknowledgement’ that there is nothing nice to say about Chris Ambrose, a monster who devours childhood, pays jews to abuse his own family, does not deserve to be a dad, angers a righteous god, is irresponsible, reckless, deviant, and destructive to children; his conduct towards kids violates public policy of promoting strong families, loving parents, and well cared for kids, his disdain for the right of the public to scrutinize drama on a public stage is comical, but in a sad, sick sort of way. The only false statements at hand belong to Mad Man. Who pays $720 filing fee for fifty-two pages of blither with the same court that abuses children? The insane Ambrose demands:
The apology must be frank and full, a weak, grudging or half-hearted effort will not
suffice. Both the retractions and apologies must appear in the manner comparable to that
of his original statements and must be disseminated to the same audiences.
Here is Mad Man’s relief, certified by Blog Quality Control Department, signed off by general counsel, to be frank, full, not weak, not grudging, not half-hearted, but in full suffice:
A special place in Hell awaits child predators.
